Examining own racism important to understanding others

One of the best things about college are those philosophical conversations you can have with your friends, especially sometime past midnight.

I experienced one of those nights recently. This time, the conversation flowed quite freely with the help of such benign drinks like the mandatory cup of tea for my friend and the requisite Pepsi for me. We must have chalked up the usual number of topics: Vladimir Putin, girls, career plans and Vladimir Putin. Putin has been a feature in our conversations ever since that whole Crimea debacle started. Sometime during this conversation, I was accused of racism. Specifically, I was told that I didn’t like white people.

I won’t say that I was like “whoa, stop right there, I am not racist.” I think I was quiet for some time. I am usually the master of the rebuttal but this time I was dumb for a few moments. In the darkness, you could almost see the triumph in my friend’s face. I am always playing the race card.

But this time, I had been one upped. After an eternity, I believe I uttered these words.

“Some of my best friends are white.”

“Some of my best friends are black,” I had discovered a while ago, is a common refrain in America employed whenever a white person is accused of racism. They try to defend themselves by asserting their network. So what happens when a black guy is accused of racism? Well, I have been waiting to use this line my entire life. Of course I had to say it, “Some of my best friends are white.”

I have always wondered who these black friends are. I told my pal that I would name my 10 white best friends. My friend took me up on this offer. So here is the roll call. Disclaimer: I, of full body and mind, hereby claim the list you are about to encounter as wholly true. Some names have been changed to protect the identity of friends. This is a list of my friends, and their white credentials.

Exhibit No. 1 on the best friend’s list was actually my best friend – the white guy who accused me of not liking white guys. First, as I pointed to Fasli and said: “You are my best friend and I don’t think we can get whiter than you.” Fasli is from Azerbaijan. He is from the Caucasus region. Yes Caucasus, as in Caucasian.

Exhibit No. 2 is the first girl I ever really fell for is white. I fell so hard you would have thought Muhammad Ali administered the knockout punch. We are still good friends.

Exhibit No. 3 is my host family. They are a nice middle class family straight out of suburbia.

I could easily rack up four numbers because I count each individual member as a friend. They welcomed me into America.

Exhibit No. 4 is J. The respect I have for her is the same I have for my mother.

Exhibit No. 5 and G. and M. Aside from Fasli, they are the second whitest people I know. They are Tea Partiers and Anti-Obama. They continually remind me that the President and I share a birth place. G. strongly believes in American exceptionalism. Despite this, they are the nicest couple I have ever met. I consider them the grandparents I never had. They consider me a grandson.

Exhibit No. 6 is Kirill. He is Belarusian, which literally means White Russian. Although as I have mentioned in a previous column, Kirill’s knowledge of hip hop culture is much deeper than mine so his white credentials are a little bit suspect. He has too much street cred in the hood.

No. 7 is Schyler. She is an amazing gal with an awesome personality. And, No. 8 is S., another awesome gal.

Exhibit No. 9 is Eric. He is actually the first white guy had a real conversation with. We were waiting for our flights in New York.

He was also the first friend I made in America. Though once he flew to Miami, we have not seen each other for five years, we still we occasionally keep in touch. Since we met, he has gone from D list actor to B list a movie star.

Exhibit No. 10 is G. and family. They are another family that I consider my family away from home.

So that’s it. Ten actual white friends. How many black, white or Hispanic friends do you have? I challenge you to expand your horizons and make some new, real friends.